Arlene’s Executive Leadership Training Tip

“We change when the pain of remaining who we are is greater than the fear of changing.”

                                    Ronald Fox

As many of you know, I’ve been business coaching for women the past twenty years.  My work is all about helping women change their mindsets, to become empowered and confident, in maximizing their potential for greater personal and professional success.  Change is hard! Fox tells us it is important to understand that “when we change our beliefs, we are changing who we are, a fundamental identity”. 

Through coaching hundreds of women, I’ve partnered with them as they walk through the resistance, fear, pain and joy they experience during the process.  When my clients reach the point of truly understanding that all of us are on a journey of discovery and growth, they reach the other side of the process and begin to feel the reward of living freely in all they choose to do.  These women learn and experience the value of the ability to choose their thoughts and concentrate on what they wish to create. They understand that they set the course of their lives, no one else.  

Arlene’s Executive Leadership Training Tip 

“We seldom think of what we have, but always of what we lack”  Arthur Schopenhauer

I recently worked with a client, who shared a negative feeling about herself, that she couldn’t shake when interacting with others.   I asked her more than once, “what are you willing to do differently that can help you change this feeling?”  She resisted and stayed stuck for awhile, unable to see what she could do differently. 

The breakthrough came, when I suggested that she switch her thinking and start becoming grateful for having these people in her life and what she was receiving from them (even if it was negative).  When we go beyond ourselves in certain situations, we are able to identify the true value of an interaction.  Whether it is a colleague, subordinate, friend, or a superior, we can view these people as giving us their companionship, friendship, knowledge, and more.

This insight pushed my client to realize how her misguided feelings were preventing her from receiving what others had to offer her.  How many times do we enter into an interaction carrying pre-conceived negative thinking about how others may feel or react to us?  Try interfacing with others from a place of gratefulness and see what positive changes will appear in your life.

Executive Leadership Training

American spiritual philosopher, David Spangler, defines possibility thinking as, “not automatically saying no to something, avoiding the automatic response.”

When we engage in possibility thinking we remain open to changing situations in our life.  How, you may ask?  When we truly understand the Law of Attraction we “get” that most of the time we are so conditioned in our thinking and habits, that what we are putting out to the universe does not match our desires. 

Mahatma Gandhi said, “we must be the change we wish to see…” Most of us spend so much time thinking about what we don’t want that we are not allowing ourselves to manifest what we do want.  Once you truly understand that we get what we think about, whether we want it or not, then and only then, can you bring what you truly desire into your life.

Come back on Thursday for the rest of the story and tools to achieve what you desire.

Letting Go of What Doesn’t Work

“See that any time you feel pained or defeated, it is only because you insist on clinging to what doesn’t work. Dare to let go and you won’t lose a thing except for a punishing idea.”

Guy Finley
Author of The Secret of Letting Go

My virtual assistant sent me this quote the other day.  It really hit home with me as there is no one I know in business who hasn’t felt defeated at one time or another. Those who go on to succeed turn these episodes into motivators for moving forward. Remember : The harder you fall, the more likely you will “go inside” and let go of what happened.  This allows you to figure out your part in the defeat, and pushes you to move on to much bigger and better.

Memorial Day, May 30, 2011

The words Barack Obama spoke upon awarding Gerda Weissmann (Holocaust Survivor) the Presidential Medal of Freedom brought out an awareness in me that I’d like to share with you this week, “as an author, a historian and a crusader for tolerance, she has taught the world that it is often in our most hopeless moments that we discover the extent of our strength and the depth of our love.” 

What is it that enabled Gerda Weissmann to rise above all that she experienced and not become completely victimized by it? Although I’ve never met her, I suspect that it was her ability not to see herself as a victim of her experiences.  Instead she allowed them to help her discover her essence, the greater truth of her being.  In this way she was able to bring forth her love and intelligence and use it to carry out her “mission of tolerance”.  Recently, Weissmann said, “ I love this country with a love that only one who has been homeless and hungry for as long as I had been, can have.”

Reading about her life has made me more aware than ever, that my own hopeless moments have been gifts in disguise.  The fear and darkness I feel during these periods actually open me to the “light” of my being  not the labels I have chosen to accept from others or put upon myself.   Thank you, Gerda Weissmann.

Thinking Big

Without vision we die!  Visions are simply a statement of possibility. This is the reason to think “Big” and get out of limitation thinking.  The bigger you think the more you will create in your life.  Commit to thinking big and learn how to do it by being consciously aware of your thoughts.  The bigger you think the better chance you have in creating what you truly desire.  All great leaders have had big visions and the ability to risk the actions that would manifest them

On June 9, I will be starting a coaching program that includes forming a mastermind with like-minded people.  You will learn how to think big and take risk. Please CLICK HERE to get all the details.

You don’t want to miss this opportunity, I know your life will be changed for the better with this experience.

Have a great week!

Belief

Learning to truly believe you can have what you desire is difficult for most people.  It requires an expansion of consciousness and redefinition of habits, attitudes and beliefs.  The letting go of “old thinking” and ways of behaving, brings us fear and inner resistance.  Working with a coach or mentor can help you move through the discomfort of this stage and keep you motivated.  Taking professional and personal development classes and reading books on this subject will expand your knowledge and give you tools to work through the challenges of this major life change.  Form or join a support group of like minded people who will keep you encouraged.

On June 9, I will be starting a coaching program that includes forming a mastermind with like-minded people.  Please CLICK HERE to get all the details.

I know that if you join, your life will be changed for the better with this experience.

Have a great week!

A Time for Resurrection

In light of this past week’s event around Bin Laden in Pakistan, I want to share a perspective that I share with my professional and personal development clients frequently.  First, I do not condone the celebration of killing anyone, no matter how evil the person or events may be.  I am happy, however, that as always good can come from a very bad situation.  This event helped many of us put closure on the terrible events of 9/11 and its effects, not only on our country, but our personal and collective psyches.  We can now resurrect ourselves and go forward confidently, knowing that we have the ability to create the kind of world we want to live in, just as we can nurture the seeds within us that manifest happiness and good in our lives. 

Have a great week!

Watching the Royal Wedding this past weekend brought up the word “commitment” for me.  I realized that commitment in marriage parallels many aspects of our lives.  What drives commitment is our passion.  Passion bubbles up from deep within us and pushes us to commit to our desires, in life and love.  Many people have lost their ability to go inside, recognize their desires and find their true passions.  Instead they dance around them, but never allow themselves to truly discover and “be” them.  This commitment requires a great deal of soul searching and learning, to hear, or feel the inner urges that nudge you quietly and silently.  Without this ability, you cannot form the foundation of success in your endeavors.  All successful leaders know how to use their passions to support  their achievements and create desired results.