What is Real Love?
I’ve been studying Real Love for almost a year. It’s been an honor to work with the developer of this philosophy, Greg Bear, intensively since January. Below is an excerpt from his blog. Read what he says carefully. There is deep meaning in what he writes.
What Does Real Love Look Like?
As a principle alone, Real Love is transformational. As I have taught the definition and nature of Real Love to people all around the world, I have been impressed with how they have lit up with understanding. As they have realized the role of Real Love in their lives—and the role of the lack of Real Love—they have come to understand their own behavior, the behavior of the people around them, and their relationships. This understanding alone can have a profound impact.
The impact of understanding Real Love as a principle, however, pales virtually to nothingness beside the power of Real Love itself. As people actually feel Real Love…
- they feel a sense of profound connection to the people who love them.
- they no longer feel alone.
- they lose their emptiness and fear.
- they no longer have a need for the anger in their lives, so it simply begins to gradually disappear.
- the other Getting and Protecting Behaviors begin to vanish, also because there is no need for them in the absence of emptiness and fear.
- they feel a deep sense of peace and happiness.
Studying the principles of Real Love is fascinating and productive, but the real goal is to feel the power of Real Love. So what does Real Love look like? Regrettably, the world has sold us a terribly deceptive counterfeit of love, so we see love as…
- hugs.
- kisses.
- sex.
- more sex.
- romantic poetry.
- candlelight dinners.
- flowers.
- gifts.
- expensive gifts.
- elaborate and sentimental expressions of “I can’t live without you.”
Sometimes Real Love does involve some of the elements we just listed, but just as often love has nothing to do with these expressions. Real Love means caring about another person’s genuine happiness. Again, what does that look like?
