Thursday, November 21, 2013 Pearl of Wisdom

Today’s Pearl is one from my archive. Enjoy!

Did anyone ever tell you that you were created to be great?  If they did, did you believe them?  As a leadership coach, many of the women and men I meet and work with have no concept of their greatness.  Instead they see themselves as having little value in their home and work environments.  I believe this is mainly due to their lack of confidence.  Most people who lack confidence live with a belief system based on the thinking, “they can’t be, have, or do enough”. They are stuck in a pattern that consistently spirals them downward and prevents them from creating and having what they want in their lives.

How does this pattern develop? First, as children many of us are expected to excel continuously in school, sports, and all the other endeavors of our lives.  If we don’t succeed, we are made to feel “less than” by our parents, teachers and coaches and religious leaders through the criticism and judgments about our performance.  Usually it is by people who do not feel confident and good about themselves.  The truth is they have it all backwards.  These people never learned that everyone has greatness in them and they need to be encouraged to find it.

From a very early stage of life these negative adult behaviors teach us to live from the “outside in” and create false beliefs about ourselves. The ego part of the mind keeps these false beliefs going.  As we grow older and have more experiences that reinforce our inabilities to “do, be or have” more than others around us, we are often frustrated and create more sabotaging experiences that perpetuate these feelings about ourselves.

How do we stop these patterns?  First we must break our denial around these “false beliefs” and recognize that developing confidence is an “inside job”.  We need to look at our behaviors, attitudes and thinking and how they contribute to our feelings about ourselves.   Then, we need to gain new knowledge to help us see the truths about the universal laws of the universe and how distorted they have become in our minds.  We search for our greatness by learning from others who have found it through books, coaches, and classes. Slowly, this information helps us move forward to take risk and implement what we are learning.

Is it a difficult journey?  Yes, at times it is but it is one of the most rewarding because you will find your true authentic self and bring it out to shine.  As you begin to shine, you will develop more confidence and see your greatness.  You will put energy into motion that will bring you more happiness then you deemed imaginable.

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