Dear Readers,

This is a hard decision but I am putting my blog on hold.  I am coping with a life-threatening illness and have been on medical leave from my coaching work since October, 2013.  It has been a joy to write my weekly Pearl of Wisdom all these years.  Now, it is time for me to spend all my time getting well.  When I’m feeling better, I’ll create a book of all my blogs for those who are interested.  And if I feel up to it, I may post a blog  or two occasionally.

I feel incredible gratitude to all of you who have read these blogs and used the wisdom of my experience  to improve your lives.  Life brings hard bumps at times for all of us.  There is no doubt in my mind that this illness is all about my spiritual healing.  In the end, it will help me help all of you discover new truths in life.

Warmly,

Arlene Rosenberg

This post is one from my archive. Enjoy, and have a great holiday!

Can you rethink your ideas about gratitude?

“Let us come with thanksgiving also, for a thankful heart is in harmony with life”

The Science of Mind—p. 447

Yesterday an awful thing happened to me.  I once again had to face the fact that I’m human and make many mistakes, some big and some small.  Reviewing my calendar I realized that I had made an error and would be out of town visiting friends with my husband on the date and time I was supposed to give a presentation.  Although I was honest about it to the event planner (a close friend and colleague), shame immediately rose within me. How could I do this to her and disappoint my husband and friends?  During the rest of the day and evening I periodically beat myself up for being so disorganized, checked airlines and talked with my husband about it.  Of course, we were both upset.

Somehow I knew I needed to journal about this and clear my thoughts.  Experience has taught me this is the best way to calm down and see things clearly.  The result, I slept through the night and re-empowered myself as I began to understand that mistakes happen no matter how responsible we want to be. I decided to stick with my original plans and work out a solution with my colleague.  Her response was great and she actually reminded me of something I had journaled—“this was meant to happen even if we don’t know the reason”.  It also looks like I will have another chance at the beginning of next year.  WOW!

This incident and journaling about it opened me to rethink my ideas about gratitude. I experienced the love of deep friendship, better interaction with my spouse and the ability to “let go” quickly.  It also confirmed my spiritual beliefs.  I am grateful.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

Today’s Pearl is one from my archive. Enjoy!

Did anyone ever tell you that you were created to be great?  If they did, did you believe them?  As a leadership coach, many of the women and men I meet and work with have no concept of their greatness.  Instead they see themselves as having little value in their home and work environments.  I believe this is mainly due to their lack of confidence.  Most people who lack confidence live with a belief system based on the thinking, “they can’t be, have, or do enough”. They are stuck in a pattern that consistently spirals them downward and prevents them from creating and having what they want in their lives.

How does this pattern develop? First, as children many of us are expected to excel continuously in school, sports, and all the other endeavors of our lives.  If we don’t succeed, we are made to feel “less than” by our parents, teachers and coaches and religious leaders through the criticism and judgments about our performance.  Usually it is by people who do not feel confident and good about themselves.  The truth is they have it all backwards.  These people never learned that everyone has greatness in them and they need to be encouraged to find it.

From a very early stage of life these negative adult behaviors teach us to live from the “outside in” and create false beliefs about ourselves. The ego part of the mind keeps these false beliefs going.  As we grow older and have more experiences that reinforce our inabilities to “do, be or have” more than others around us, we are often frustrated and create more sabotaging experiences that perpetuate these feelings about ourselves.

How do we stop these patterns?  First we must break our denial around these “false beliefs” and recognize that developing confidence is an “inside job”.  We need to look at our behaviors, attitudes and thinking and how they contribute to our feelings about ourselves.   Then, we need to gain new knowledge to help us see the truths about the universal laws of the universe and how distorted they have become in our minds.  We search for our greatness by learning from others who have found it through books, coaches, and classes. Slowly, this information helps us move forward to take risk and implement what we are learning.

Is it a difficult journey?  Yes, at times it is but it is one of the most rewarding because you will find your true authentic self and bring it out to shine.  As you begin to shine, you will develop more confidence and see your greatness.  You will put energy into motion that will bring you more happiness then you deemed imaginable.

This Pearl is one from my archives. Enjoy!

Arlene’s Executive Leadership Tip

3 Tips for Clarity at Work and Home

I believe in the Proverb that states: “Where there is no vision, the people perish.”   Each of us has a “still small voice” within us.  When we become still (quiet) on a regular basis, we can hear this voice and let it guide us.  As your executive coach, I have listed three tips below to help you create peace and success in your life through clarity.

1)    If we are not clear on what we want, we cannot take the actions that will manifest them. Sit with your desires and become clear on what they really are and how they will benefit you and others.  This can be done with the help of meditation and journaling.

Make an effort to take the time to journal several times a week.  It’s amazing how much clearer you become on your life and how it helps you see the actions you need to take to create what you want.

2)    When you become clear on what you truly want, then create a plan to manifest your desires. Planning is key to the process.  When you have a good plan, you will not fail as long as it is for the good of all.  Most people today are so harried they forget to use this basic tool and then questions why “things” are not happening for them.

3)    When we create a vision we do not have to worry about how it will happen. Too many people are so worried about the outcome that they forget to follow their plan and just take the next appropriate step(s).

This post is one from my archives. Enjoy!

Recently I have experienced the major drugstore and grocery chains have asked me to donate to a variety of causes when I check out.  Because my belief is that you cannot ever give too much, I am not offended.   Fortunately, when my “ego” falls into lack and limitation thinking, my positive thinking kicks in and I donate very willingly.  The feeling of inner joy I have afterward is so uplifting.

Today I was in the Walgreens near my home.  Again, I was asked to donate and I agreed.  After the woman at the register checked me out, she stated, “you have just received a free certificate to use in Walgreens for double the amount of your donation.  This was such a clear message and reminder to me that the Laws of the Universe are real.  In the last few days, I have donated several times in the same way and nothing happened!  Each time I donated, I said to myself, “of course when you give you will get back.” Having no expectation of what I would receive or how, the phrase increased my belief each time I stated it.

By repeating this affirmation, I have truly been able to experience how the universal Law of Cause and Effect works.  This has brought me large and small door prizes, upgraded hotel rooms, free airline tickets, increased business and much more.

Many of you know that one of my consistent themes is using positivity in your words and thoughts along with believing them as best you can.  It’s never too late!  Just be aware that it doesn’t happen immediately, it’s a process that takes time.  If you hang in there, you will not be disappointed.

This Pearl is one from my archives. Enjoy!

A corporation has hired me to work with an executive whose behavioral skills are preventing him from being promoted into a leadership VP position.  We have had several sessions, including the sharing of behavioral assessments that he has taken.  I learned that my client is impatient, doesn’t listen well and is condescending to his peers, subordinates and colleagues.  Until recently, this client was unable to comprehend that his poor responses to others in the organization had nothing to do with the behaviors of the other people.

He is learning that his behavior has everything to do with his own unhappiness.  It is having a strong effect on his relationships in the workplace and at home.  Unfortunately, this is not an uncommon story.  Most of us are unhappy because our needs and desires are not being met.  Many of us feel that having a great deal of money, wearing expensive clothing, earning promotions at work, having smart children, playing games on our smart phones, etc., will bring us this happiness.   It doesn’t.  Not the happiness I’m talking about.

The happiness I’m referring to means experiencing unconditional love and acceptance.  Without these things we feel empty, alone and afraid.  We do not feel secure and at peace with ourselves.  When we feel secure we can be more tolerant of ourselves and the behavior of others.   By practicing acceptance and learning to be more truthful with others, we do not feel the need to criticize and blame.  Giving up these behaviors in the workplace takes a great deal of courage.   If you are interested in learning more about this philosophy and changing your life, email me ar@arlenerosenberg.com for a free introductory session.

Today’s Pearl is one from my archive. Enjoy!

Did anyone ever tell you that you were created to be great?  If they did, did you believe them?  As a leadership coach, many of the women and men I meet and work with have no concept of their greatness.  Instead they see themselves as having little value in their home and work environments.  I believe this is mainly due to their lack of confidence.  Most people who lack confidence live with a belief system based on the thinking, “they can’t be, have, or do enough”. They are stuck in a pattern that consistently spirals them downward and prevents them from creating and having what they want in their lives.

How does this pattern develop? First, as children many of us are expected to excel continuously in school, sports, and all the other endeavors of our lives.  If we don’t succeed, we are made to feel “less than” by our parents, teachers and coaches and religious leaders through the criticism and judgments about our performance.  Usually it is by people who do not feel confident and good about themselves.  The truth is they have it all backwards.  These people never learned that everyone has greatness in them and they need to be encouraged to find it.

From a very early stage of life these negative adult behaviors teach us to live from the “outside in” and create false beliefs about ourselves. The ego part of the mind keeps these false beliefs going.  As we grow older and have more experiences that reinforce our inabilities to “do, be or have” more than others around us, we are often frustrated and create more sabotaging experiences that perpetuate these feelings about ourselves.

How do we stop these patterns?  First we must break our denial around these “false beliefs” and recognize that developing confidence is an “inside job”.  We need to look at our behaviors, attitudes and thinking and how they contribute to our feelings about ourselves.   Then, we need to gain new knowledge to help us see the truths about the universal laws of the universe and how distorted they have become in our minds.  We search for our greatness by learning from others who have found it through books, coaches, and classes. Slowly, this information helps us move forward to take risk and implement what we are learning.

Is it a difficult journey?  Yes, at times it is but it is one of the most rewarding because you will find your true authentic self and bring it out to shine.  As you begin to shine, you will develop more confidence and see your greatness.  You will put energy into motion that will bring you more happiness then you deemed imaginable.

This Pearl is one from my archives…enjoy!

Creating High Vibration Energy

This week I am going back to the basics.  Our life creations are totally dependent on our energetic thoughts.  Low vibrations of negativity produce sluggish, stuck emotions such as sadness, gloom and despondency.  Well-being, joy and happiness come from the high vibration of positive thoughts.

Many of you have read my book and practiced affirmations diligently. You’ve created visions and believed in them wholeheartedly.  What is the reason these practices haven’t worked?  Although I may not have all the answers, today I’ll give you a few:

• Change of thinking must take place on a subconscious level
• Visualization is crucial to saying affirmations
• Belief in what you do want vs. belief in what you don’t want

Most beliefs start in childhood and are based on our parent’s actions.  For example, seeing parents fight over money produces images and thoughts that support “money is bad.” Continued exposure to these types of experiences embeds them into our belief system at the subconscious level.

Later on, learning that money is just energy and wanting more of it, most people still continue “need”and “lack” based thinking, espousing words like “I don’t have enough money.”  After all, we learned that money was bad.  Breaking the cycle, means thinking from a place of, “I have all that I need and I am so grateful for it.” The universal Law of Attraction will always create more of the same.

We must create a stream of thinking at a high energy vibration in order to change our subconscious thoughts.  Visualization supports the emotions we need for sustaining a high energy level.  Visualizing images of all the good we have in our lives creates strong positive emotions.  Just being grateful for waking up in the morning is positive.  If you’re not feeling well, know that the body has all it needs to get better.  Learning to be grateful is hard work.  With what you already know, it will pay off in “spades.”

Wanted to share this post. Enjoy!

A Personal Confession

by Dan Rockwell

At lunch, I told my wife I thought I’d clean my office before working on “the book.”

She laughed hysterically. She laughed so much that I started laughing too.

When she finally stopped, – after starting and stopping several times – I said, “I didn’t think it was that funny.”

Read more here.

Are you ready for true happiness at work?

Typically the summer flies by for most of us.  It’s the time of year that we all look forward to for relaxing the pace, going on vacations and spending more time with our friends and families. We feel happier and freer.   During a conversation with a client today he remarked that there was sadness for him at the end of this season and the freedom it represented.  Upon further discussion, it became apparent that he saw the summer as an end to any freedom he felt.  He owned that he was already overworked and saw drudgery in the upcoming months because he would be putting in even more hours at work with no extra help.

I suggested that his unhappiness had to do with a need to constantly “be doing” at work and home and a need for perfection in all that he approached.   He believed that this behavior would make him successful and productive.    It was apparent to me that this client was trying to build his esteem through his work.  A mistake many of us make.  Good self-esteem comes from feeling loved which results in confidence, happiness and success.

After 20+ years of executive coaching and working with hundreds of clients, I explained that being successful does not necessarily make you happy or feel good about yourself.   Feeling the freedom to do what makes us happy brings about the kind of success we are all looking for.   Moving from a human doing mindset to one of choosing happiness in all that we do is very difficult for most people. It feels like we are working against what our society believes and pushes.  By the end of the session, my client knew what he wanted to be working in in our upcoming meetings.

This past year I have walked through a happiness mind shift.  Yes, there were several fearful moments. Despite these feelings, I can truthfully tell you it is working.  Not only am I happier and earning more money, I feel more free than ever.  If you want to create true happiness in your life, improve your relationships and have more work success, call me for a free 30 minute consult.  Don’t let fear stand in the way of your happiness and success.